Archive | April, 2011

I’m 15 with my first boyfriend and I don’t know how to tell my parents! What should I do?!

29 Apr

Dear Losers,

I’m 15 with my first boyfriend and I don’t know how to tell my parents. Oh yeah, did I tell you I have 7 brothers?! I want to be totally honest with them, but I don’t want to have to go through the drama that comes with it. What should I do?!

Madison, 15

I totally understand your concern. You want to be a good daughter, but at the same time you don’t want to be grounded for life.

You're grounded, Missy!

I’m going to assume your parents and 90,000 brothers are somewhat strict and overprotective. My parents are too, so I can definitely commiserate. And sometimes it can be even harder dealing with the men in the family.

Tricia’s Dad once decided to clean his guns when she had guy friends over, like straight out of a country song. As they are walking through the house, they run into her dad who is *chick-chick-ing* his rifle. In a completely casual tone he says,

"Oh hey guys!"

Oh hey guys! Just doing some cleaning. What’s going on?

Totally embarrassing, right?

It can be frustrating because while your parents are strict, some kids parents are not, so they don’t understand what you are going through. Their parents think it’s adorable they have a boyfriend. They don’t pull out weapons, they pull out baby books to start scrapbooking “Baby’s First Boyfriend!”

But every parent is just trying to do the right thing. You’ve got to look at it from their perspective. They’ve gotten you this far, and they don’t want you messing up your future by spending too much time with some loser. Parents just want reassurance (and good grades, good jobs, etc.) As my mom always says (in an extremely concerned tone), Reassure us.

Parents don’t want to have to worry about you more than they already do. Which is a lot. And it’s better to be honest with your parents than sneak behind their backs. As long as they feel like they can trust you and your dating judgment, things may be a little less tense.

Plus it’s not like teen dating is such a ridiculous idea.

TONIGHT on the 10′ o clock news. Teen Dating. It’s a dangerous trend sweeping the nation. Is your child showing interest in the opposite sex?  We’ll show you the warning signs TONIGHT.

So here’s the plan:

1. Tell your parents you have a boyfriend.

2. Acknowledge their concerns and reassure the crap out of them.

3. Suck up.

4. Tell your boyfriend how to suck up to them.

Here’s a sample script (Feel free to improv and add in actual factual information):

Hey, Mom and Dad! God, you guys are looking young today! Have you lost weight?

Anyway, I have a boyfriend. I know, I know, you might be worried because you are really good parents, but there is no need to worry because it is not serious. I am a smart girl (pull out great report card and raise eyebrows) and I’m not going to do anything stupid like girls on MTV.

I’m not going to lose my mind or spend all my time with my boyfriend or start getting bad grades. (Point again to report card.) You raised me better than that! (Optional high five to your mom, cheesy wink to your Dad).

Then you have to reassure them about your boyfriend.

He’s a really nice boy with upstanding morals. He doesn’t do drugs, he just sells them. (Insert laughter to show you’re kidding.) He wants to be an engineer and I’m pretty sure he’s the heir to some foreign throne. (Blah blah blah, insert other stuff parents want to hear.) Don’t worry you’ll get to meet him as soon as he’s back from volunteering in Chile.

Well, I have to go mow the lawn now, so I’ll see you guys at dinner. But don’t worry, I’m making it. (Optional wink and point)

Then get on the phone and coach your boyfriend on how to deal with your parents. You don’t have to scare the crap out of him, but just make sure he has great manners, especially around your parents. I had a mother tell me she had never met her daughter’s boyfriend because when he picks her up he just honks.

Let's GO!

EXCUSE ME?! Is he your boyfriend or head of the soccer carpool?

Incredibly rude.

Make sure your boyfriend always comes to the window, I mean door when he picks you up, and make sure he greets your parents. No one wants their daughter dating a rude Shady Brady.

I have to commend my high school guy friends. They always had great manners around my parents, and thusly my parents were happy to have them over. Sometimes I would even come home and find them chatting it up with my dad in the garage. Yes, you heard right, they would hang out with my parents when I wasn’t even home.

Now that’s what I call quality sucking up.

So reassure them and stay a responsible young adult.

And most importantly, suck up.

Keep us posted!

If you like this post, please link it to your Facebook or Twitter account! Or add it to StumbleUpon or Digg. Thanks! 

Related posts: 

How Do You Know When Boys Are Lying?

http://stopbeingaloser.org/2010/06/28/so-i-have-this-friend-boyslie/

Romeo Wasn’t  a Jerk to Juliet

http://stopbeingaloser.org/2010/10/04/romeoandjuliet/

Random Rec Wednesday: Baby Wipes

27 Apr

I know, what you’re thinking. What is this? Advice for babies?!?

What is this? A center for ANTS?!

No, no calm down. My recommendation is to use baby wipes as makeup remover.

Yup, you heard me.

I first heard about  it on The View (a trusted source for news). They said baby wipes have similar ingredients to  makeup remover, but baby wipes are much cheaper.

Well, they had me at much cheaper.

My favorite are Pampers Natural Aloe Unscented Baby Wipes because they don’t smell like baby wipes. I’ve gotten a lot of my friends into them, and they agree. But to each her own!

I must warn you, you will feel a little strange buying them. I’ve been buying them for years and the younger you are, the more people will assume you are a Teen Mom, but so what! Who cares! You’re saving money!

The View | Video | Top 10 Moments: #8 – “So what! Who cares??”.

Motivating Mondays: Invisible Children – Please donate $25 to their 25 Campaign today, April 25!

25 Apr

Have you guys heard about Invisible Children?

It’s an organization that was started by 3 college kids from Southern California. They want to stop the use of children soldiers in Uganda’s 25 year long war and they have already accomplished so much. They have built schools for scores of children as well as found them safety.

Amazing.

Sometimes I get so caught up in my own issues that I forget there are serious injustices like this in the world. These children are truly suffering. I spent my childhood driving my Power Wheels Jeep and watching Family Matters.And kids in Uganda are spending their childhood as soldiers? It’s terrifying and just plain wrong.

Here’s what you can do to help:

The Invisible Children founders were on Oprah last Wednesday talking about their 25 Campaign. Today, April 25th they are asking that people donate $25 dollars and stay silent for 25 hours to speak out against 25 YEARS of violence. $25 gets you an RSVP to Break the Silence events tonight across the country. Mumford and Sons, Plain White T’s, David Archuleta and various other hip people will be performing! (Space is limited)

And more importantly, that $25 also  goes to help build the region’s first rehabilitation center, implement an early warning security network, support the international campaign to arrest Joseph Kony, rescue his child soldiers and bring peace after 25 years of war.

If you can’t shut up for 25 hours, let alone 25 seconds, at least consider donating  $25 dollars here: http://www2.invisiblechildren.com/25

(I did, and no, I’m not above a guilt trip.)

Check out Invisible Children on Oprah:

http://www.oprah.com/oprahshow/Invisible-Children-Founders-Talk-About-Uganda-and-Joseph-Kony-Video

And watch one intern talk about her quest to get Oprah’s support.

No one wants to feel invisible.

Help with Mr. Elusive!

22 Apr

Dear Losers,

So I’ve been hanging out with this guy and we went on a few dates.  I haven’t seen him in a couple weeks but he always responds to my texts. I thought we hit it off and I really like him. What should I do??

-Kayley

When I find myself liking a guy and asking my friends what should I do??? I usually realize the answer is:

Nothing.

I know. Bummer right? You want to fix the problem and figure out how to make him like you. But you can’t do that. It’s not like going on eHow and looking up how to buy vintage sunglasses. (Actual article – http://www.ehow.com/facts_6885431_buy-retro-sunglasses.html )

You can’t make him ask you out again. Well you can but I imagine it would involve illegal activity.

I would assume nothing serious is going on between you guys, at least for now. Yes, Mr. Elusive has been responsive as of late, but that’s not the same thing as him making effort. Yeah he hasn’t fallen off the face of the earth and he is politely responding to you, but he should be texting you and asking you to hang out. For any relationship to get off the ground, it takes two people making effort.

Let him come around if he wants to. Sometimes guys do and sometimes they don’t. And if they don’t, their loss.

Because when it comes to boys, if you are asking yourself What should I do? even before you are dating, it’s not a great sign. You really should only be asking yourself, what should I do??  if you messed up big time. You know, like if you threw a Charlie Sheen-like tantrum, or got caught installing spyware in his car, or ran over his PS2.

Sorry about your Playstation! Muhaha

Then you can be like, Oh S*%#! WHAT SHOULD I DO?????????????????

(I’m assuming you haven’t committed any of these infractions).

And I totally understand the feeling of what should I do? How can I fix this? I have definitely had that pestering feeling when I like a guy and he’s being hot and cold, or cold and cold. Maybe that can be a new Katy Perry song?

I digress.

If he doesn’t come around,  it doesn’t mean its personal. Or that he’s a jerk. Maybe he’s not looking for a girlfriend. If you are looking for a relationship and he isn’t, than the two of you are automatically on different pages. And then how are you supposed to read this love story together?!

'Sup?'

I wouldn’t invest your efforts chasing after this guy, or wondering what’s going on. Because when’s something IS going on, you’ll know. Find a boy that makes effort to hang out with you. And when you stop texting Mr. Elusive, he will notice. And as boys do, he will probably start texting you. Just don’t get too invested until someone shows they are invested in you too!

Random Rec Wednesday: Extreme Couponing!

20 Apr

I know we just talked about a TV show on Monday, but…. okay I have no good excuse.

I love Extreme Couponing. And I don’t know why! It’s the same thing every episode.

Person gets coupons, person goes to store and fills 9 carts with complex carbs, person spends 2 hours checking out, person spends 2 cents and people in grocery store clap.

But every good show  needs a formula right?

Anyway, I love this show because it’s so fascinating. The couponers come from all walks of life. Some have been through rough financial times, some are concerned parents, some give to charity and okay a lot of them belong on Hoarders. But a show called Reasonable Couponing wouldn’t make for exciting TV, right?

They spend a large amount of their time couponing. I don’t even know how they go on vacation because they’d probably worry about missing  a sale on Apple Jax.

But these hoarders thrifty shoppers inspired me to start couponing. Because why not coupon?

Couponing was something I used to associate with soccer moms or people who only eat fast food. But recently I started thinking about all the coupons I get with my grocery receipt, on products I buy, or in my mail that I TOTALLY WASTE.

I’m  good about using promo codes I get in my email, but I’m not always good about using physical coupons. Why? Probably because my inbox is more searchable than my room. There is no gmail search for stuff in my apartment. Wouldn’t that be awesome though?

New Gmail feature! Search your inbox……….and your house!

Cook that up, Google!

Anyway, I realized that reasonable couponing just takes a dash of organization. Just clip coupons for stuff you need, and keep them in an envelope in your purse. What a concept!

As someone on the show said, Coupons are the money I shop with!

She makes a great point. If some weirdo handed you 2 bucks on the street you’d run around like you won the lotto, telling everyone,

Some weirdo handed me two bucks on the street!


So why not get excited when you see a coupon?

Coupons are money, people. Get excited. And watch Extreme Couponing Wednesdays 9/8c on TLC. It’s extremely worthwhile entertaining.

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